Question of the Week
I have been looking for work for the last six months. I got rejected from three positions that I really wanted, though I was certainly qualified and could have done well with any of them. The rejection is taking its toll, and the worry that I wont find a job is bringing me down, which makes it harder to find a job, which makes me more worried, and the cycle goes on. I know I need to stop worrying, but how do I do that?
Answer
I know a big worrier. Everyone told him that worrying doesn’t help anything. One day he realised that 90% of the things he worries about never even happen. His conclusion: Worrying does help.
And he is right. Worrying does help. But you don't have to be the one to do the worrying. You can outsource it. Let G-d worry for you.
It comes as a surprise to most of us to learn that we are not running the universe. We are only given control over a small sliver of reality. We choose our behaviour, our actions and reactions. We do not choose what impact our actions will have. Whether we succeed or fail, whether we are accepted or rejected, whether we are appreciated or misunderstood is not in our control.
It would be unfair of G-d to make us responsible for a problem we are powerless to resolve. We can only do what we can do. We can make plans, and we can take precautions. They may or may not be successful. That is G-d’s problem. So let Him do the worrying.
Try this little worry-delegating meditation: Close your eyes, and breathe deeply and slowly. Envision your worries as a weight you are carrying on your shoulders. Each time you exhale, release some of the burden from your shoulders, and transfer it over to G-d. Repeat this several times, until you feel light and unburdened.
Then turn to G-d and say, “I need a job. But there is only so much I can do to make that happen. The rest is Your problem. I will do my part. I will seek out work and follow every lead that comes my way. But whether I succeed or not is out of my hands. Because I am in Yours. Which is fine with me. So G-d, I give my worries over to You. I will now get on with what I have to do.”
This is not easy to do. But it is liberating. Give it a try. And if you are concerned that it might not work, don’t worry. That’s G-d’s problem, not yours.
Good Shabbos,
Rabbi Moss
Source:
Psalms 55:23 “Throw your burden onto G-d, and He will nourish you.”